It is not that easy to not yell as it looks and once the anger builds up, it can be difficult to simmer it back down. If you have children chances are, at some point or another, you have yelled at them and there is no point to be ashamed of that, you just should try to avoid yelling. Here are some interesting facts you might find useful.
The reasons why?
It is usually because the little ones have done something wrong. Apart from being a loud and vocal outlet for frustration and anger, yelling is a way of communicating to a child that they have done the wrong thing. It is very important that children would know the difference between right and wrong. If you have done something wrong you should be punished and your children should know that. If you will let them get away with it, they will surely keep doing it.
Taking an example
Parents often do the same as they parents did with them. But if your parents did it, it is not necessarily the right way. If your parents yelled at you, it does not mean it will work on your children. Yes, showing anger to children works, but it does not mean you have to yell, there are different forms of anger (of course hitting a child is no option), like not talking to your child or taking away a computer for a week. Just show him that there are consequences to actions.
Meaning of discipline
The traditional meaning of discipline is “the practice of training people to obey the rules of behavior, using punishment to correct disobedience”. But I am not sure we can expect this term to fit the same way to children, can we? Their brain is still developing so perhaps we should only teach children but not punish them, huh?
Yelling frightens children
Everyone loses their temper from time to time, but you should look after yourself and notice how often you yell at your children. Parents have always been the greatest role models. If you will demonstrate you can remain firm and calm in a situation of challenge, you will provide those appropriate boundaries and limits. There no chance to avoide those little slips from time to time, just be sure you do not do it too often. Otherwise you may your kids to get really good at shouting.
The key to discipline is always about boundaries and consequences. And a big part of applying those boundaries and consequences is to stay calm. Of course, it is always easier said than done but when you will feel angry, do not think of how everything should be, you know that in reality everything is quite different. Just accept that reality and do not expect everything to be perfect.
Mess with your mind body connection
The body automatically knows how to show anger. Let’s take an example, like you have angry facial expressions or you clench your fist. When feeling angry the body goes into an anger default position. So just do the opposite - put yourself in a position you would be in if you were celebrating, put a smile on your face, jump around a little. After this there will be no anger left.
We all know yelling is the easiest way to discipline your children, but also, you are aware of the fact that it is not the best. Just get playful with your anger, show a good example to your children and you will be a professional of being a role model to your children.